Thursday, December 06, 2007
A warm cup of Constant Comment in a thick mug is the best kind of comfort to me. It's gotten very cold here. It seems surreal that Christmas is 19 days away. I'm more interested in huddling under my down duvet and watching Dexter, drinking my tea.
Today I got a note on Facebook from a high school acquaintance, asking me why my brother was downloading weird apps and contacting her about them. They are applications about love matches, crushes, being naughty or nice, etc. Her e-mail made me feel how I felt in high school, somehow associated with my brother's social awkwardness but also feeling fiercely protective of him. I could never understand why people thought I had some insight on why he was the way he was. I accept him for who he is. We both are awkward and weird in our own ways, but I seem to be the more socially adept of the two of us. I know what it's like to feel rejection, to be made fun of, but to also see my brother made fun of by his peers. It all hurts. That's part of the reason why I hate popularity contests, and how many friends someone has collected on MySpace and Facebook. It reminds me too much if growing up. I would give anything now for a really good friend, rather than a cache of contacts.